every time there are bank holiday adverts on the tv for those out of town diy stores, it's all i can do to hide my embarrassment, either by pretending not to notice the advertisement, or directing the conversation in an alternative direction. my only contribution to the art of do-it-yourself, is a large, unkempt pile of newspapers and magazines on the floor, something for which i'm not entirely happy to take sole responsibility.
you would perhaps sympathise with my plight if you saw the state of thewashingmachinepost bikeshed, a wooden edifice that has seen almost thirty years of use, while fending off the worst of the hebridean weather in the process. it has been coated with several different colours of wood preservative, and had its exterior walls doubled up with more than just single layers of plywood.
as star trek's mr spock would likely announce "it's diy jim, but not as we know it."
however, no matter the parlous state of this bike shelter, for that has become its sole purpose in life, at least i have one, even if the door requires a padlocked latch at the top and a bolt at the bottom to keep it closed in galeforce winds. it sits to one side of a small, postage stamp sized rear garden, its gable-end ultilised to fasten the washing line, after the pole disintegrated a few years past. however, there are many among you who will be seething with envy, that i actually possess a bike shed and a back garden. many avid cyclists are domiciled in upper floor flats, or compact and bijou houses with no outside real estate on which to place a bike shed or garage.
if we mostly adhere to velominati's rule #12, where the correct number of bicycles to own is n+1, and n = the number of bicycles already in your ownership, that is potentially a lot of bicycles to store indoors, midst comfortable and stylish living quarters. throughout recent times, there have been many proffered solutions to this conundrum; it may be possible to lock the bicycle in a hallway or on the landing; i have come across many brackets that allow bolting to an immoveable surface, before locking the bicycle to same, but those n+1 machines are more than likely to annoy, or simply get in the way of non-cycling neighbours.
brackets, shelves and many other resolutions to a concrete problem for the multitudes can prove highly effective, but are more than likely to confound the room's feng shui and lessen favour with your partner/spouse. and that's sort of where hornit's less than attractively named clug enters the fray. comprising two u-shaped plastic brackets which interlock with each other, this extremely minimal, yet effective design, takes up almost no space at all on whichever wall to which you opt to affix it, yet stores vertically, pretty much any road bicycle you care to mention. in fact, no matter the style and size of bicycle you own (road, hybrid, mtb), there's a clug designed to accommodate its presence.
of course, though the bracket may be of minimal existence, a vertically mounted bicycle is unlikely to be described in similar manner. additionally, if you've been perambulating the estates during less than clement weather, that larg(ish) bicycle will probably drip all over your sitting room or hallway carpet. and it won't be crystal clear water neither.
fixing the bracket to a wall requires a number one son, with substantially more diy nous than possessed by yours truly. additionally, he has a toolkit featuring many devices of which i remain totally ignorant. the safest option is to use the supplied screws to attach the clug directly to either a brick wall, should one be available, or preferably into a wooden batten behind the plasterboard. rather obviously, the latter will provide more support when positioning or removing the bicycle. the roadie clug accepts tyre widths ranging from 23mm all the way to an almost cyclocross 32mm. the others alluded to above take care of wider and mtb knobblies.
while the clug held a colnago master or ibis hakkalugi with a tenacious grasp, there still remains the need to avoid banging into the bicycle while carrying the suppertime tea and biscuits. though i've refrained from clouting the bicycle(s) from the side, it seem quite likely that so doing would be likely to wrench the clug from an immaculately wallpapered wall.
careful how you go.
hornit's clug device seems, on the face of it, a highly practical solution to a problem likely to become more prevalent in future years. its superpower is an admirably minimalist existence when no bicycle is slotted into its minuteness; you can even, within reason, tailor it to the decor; the roadie version can be purchased in orange/white (as reviewed), black/white or black/black for a mere £14.99, with free uk delivery. assuming you have a member of the family better acquainted with diy than you are, this is reliable, economic simplicity personified. just remember to sit the back tyre on a mat or tray if you value your relationship.
monday 30 september 2019
..........................................................................................................................................................................................................