..........................................................................................................................................................................................................
across the great divide
friday afternoon brought seasonal, yet un-hebridean weather; sun is not something to which we have become in any way accustomed over the past few, so-called, summer months. alternate fridays demand that i and two sunday morning colleagues, ride to debbie's to deliver copies of the local newspaper. in other words, an excuse for coffee. we were not long there before we were joined by a married couple, also on bicycles, but which turned out to have battery charged motive power. of this we were unaware until, in conversation, the gent made it plain that he and his wife were not professionals like my colleagues and i.
the odd part is that, while i doubt he was kidding, by describing us thus, he was highlighting the difference between them, as holidaying visitors and ourselves. happy to use e-bikes as a means of visiting as many of the distilleries as they could cram into a week's visit, their relationship with the bicycle was somewhat different than our own. had this meeting transpired even five years ago, i'm pretty sure that their bicycles would have been relatively tired touring bikes, with rear racks and a single pannier attached. technology has effectively lightened their load, so to speak.
of course, the mistaken allusion to professionalism on our behalf utterly fails to hold water. however, fast we like to think we are on the road from bowmore to bruichladdich, even the guys in the tour's grupetto would arrive well before the velo club peloton. however, a bit like a go-faster stripe on the side of a motor car, it is possible to look the part while not actually being the part. for starters, all our bicycles feature drop handlebars and a smattering of carbon fibre, even when astride steel frames. and we're generally inclined to wear bona-fide cycle jerseys and bibshorts, completing the facade as long as no-one checks the average speed on my garmin.
in our defence, i've yet to see anyone in the local swimming pool wearing levis; specific cycling apparel, while resembling that of the professional classes, is by far the most comfortable and pragmatic for the job.
i'd like to think that those of us in the local peloton are happy to engage visiting cyclists in conversation, offering any snippets of local information that might prove useful during their visit; elitist we are not. but there's no doubt that our mode of dress effectively separates us from both touring and leisure cyclists.
so does that actually make us elitist by definition, despite all that i've explained above? and by inference, i include every cyclist who identifies with the above description. let's not beat about the bush, being a cyclist in the uk leaves us wide open to accusations of eccentricity or idiosyncracy. those who commute to work or school each day will be well aware of that, probably far more so than yours truly. several of the major, and minor apparel purveyors have done their best to provide cycling apparel that fulfils every needful demand, yet looks more like everyday clothing than a jersey with three rear pockets.
the jury is still out on whether that's actually possible.
soccer fans seem to easily blend into daily society, even to the extent of wearing their jerseys into the local averagemarket. i was even in the band at a wedding reception when one of the guests dressed in such a manner, without so much as a raised eyebrow from his fellow guests. i'm not sure that would elicit a similar scenario were someone to have arrived wearing a visma lease-a-bike jersey.
so let's just accept the fact that we're a little bit different, and celebrate the fact. i'm not sure that the onus is on us, as cyclists, to attempt to fit into 'normal' society. there will have been far more watching last night's euros final, than glued to the tour de france stage on itv4 during the afternoon. (it's telling that the soccer final was shown on itv1, while velocipedinal matters are happily relegated to itv4). i cannot deny that there is a secret pleasure in attempting to discuss the outcome of the stage with the girls in the office, well aware that they're not at all interested. because they'll likely mention the soccer final, about which i couldn't give a classified hub.
but come the revolution...
monday 15 july 2024
..........................................................................................................................................................................................................the real thing
mrs washingmachinepost has been in scotland this past week visiting our daughter and grandsons. this change in circumstances has allowed me to setup the smaller of my two drumsets in the sitting room, all the better to hopefully improve my percussive skills on the real thing, as opposed to a practice pad that sits on my knees. the latter allows the honing of sticking skills, but offers little in the way of opportunity to improve my co-ordination and, indeed, my reading skills. these render the word 'rudimentary' particularly inadequate, and that, in the coming weeks, might prove a bit of a problem.
i have previously mentioned that i visit the local secondary school on a weekly basis to tutor drumming at three different levels; national 5, higher and advanced higher. unfortunately, from my point of view, the lad set to undertake higher drumming this coming year, is remarkably good and has already covered the majority of the curriculum. repeating it week in, week out, would promise little more than a very boring time for both of us.
in order to forestall this potential boredom, the music teacher has provided me with an alternative, the scores of which provide an opportunity to improve the chap's musical, reading and improvisational skills. i'm more than familiar with the regular fare which i have taught for the past seven years, and even though i'd still be hard pushed to sight-read any of the pieces, i'm perfectly capable of noting where errors are being made, and well enough versed to demonstrate how to play the more difficult parts. the stuff in this book is going to be new to both of us, and i'd prefer not to start the year on the back foot.
therefore, having my drumset assembled in the middle of the sitting room has provided the opportunity for yours truly to read the charts which will soon become a regular part of both our weekly digest. in the process of reading these charts, i have come to realise that were i to have had the facility or opportunity to practise in this manner over the length of my drumming career, i would be a considerably better drummer than is presently the case.
however, along with many aspiring musicians, my housing circumstances preclude practising at all on a real drumset; living in terraced housing has its sonic disadvantages. though i count myself as an enthusiastic and none too loud drummer, i'm not sure my close neighbours would be likely to agree.
thankfully, that's not a set of circumstances that afflict my velocipedinal activities; in fact, quite the opposite. prior to moving to the hebrides, i had a fair distance to ride before reaching open road, but even then there was substantially more vehicle traffic than is the case on islay. i feel sorry for friends who live in the big cities. a long ago visit to a colleague in london town resulted in a long and remarkably fraught bike ride to reach the leafy lanes on the city's outskirts, and even then, leafy lanes bordered with hedges did not offer a safe haven from irate drivers, upset because they'd been held up for two seconds longer than expected.
to that degree, i fully understand the desire of many to acquire a smart trainer and join the ranks of the zwifties. but it strikes me that riding in such a manner is akin to my having to drum on a practice pad; it fulfils a need, but it's very definitely not the real thing. which is why i simply do not comprehend why those who live in less worrying environs, find it necessary to ride indoors. granted, north of the border has a perfectly justified reputation for being wet, or windy, or often both. but, at the risk of pointing out the glaringly obvious, that's what waterproofs are for.
assuming that you might want to race, or simply perform well in a series of sportives, at some point in time, the elements will have to be braved. you simply cannot learn to ride in a headwind while pedalling in your living room. nor can you adapt well to riding in pouring rain by the same means. those for whom riding outside is feasible and reasonably safe, would, in my humble opinion, be well advised to take advantage. just like the fortunate residents in towns and cities across the pond, who can setup a drumset in a basement and practise to their hearts' content without fearing a knock on the door from irate neighbours.
i have seen demonstrated a mode of 'air drumming' in which the drummer's limbs are tracked by sensors, returning the sounds that each would make were a real drumset to have been present. or there's the almost ubiquitous e-drumset, where donning a pair of headphones means while you hear drum sounds, the neighbours hear only the equivalent of a practice pad. but both of those have more in common with zwift and its peers, than with wood on a plastic head attached to a cylinder of wood.
i am resigned to my fate as a drummer residing in a row of conjoined houses; it's probably too late to realise much in the way of improvement in any case. but if the great outdoors is just outside your back gate, might i suggest you take advantage of the real thing, no matter the incumbent weather conditions? technology is doing its very best to consign us all to a virtual world conditioned by artificial intelligence, a state of affairs almost inconceivable only a decade ago, but i think we'd be better off with the real thing. other than track bikes, the bicycle was designed for the great outdoors.
let's try and keep it that way.
sunday 14 july 2024
..........................................................................................................................................................................................................backstage
in my latter years of secondary education, i was a member of the school drama society, not, i hasten to add, because i harboured any bohemian or thespian aspirations, but as stage manager for both school plays and, accidentally, for the school opera, the latter presented in the town hall (sadly, now converted into flats). with the drama club existing under the ministrations of the art teacher, as a future art student, there was a certain amount of intangible pressure to take on one role or another. i opted for scenic designer/painter and stage manager. the transformation from empty stage into the interior of a country house, was well worth witnessing, even at school level.
and a bit like islay whisky aficionados pretending to believe that the spirit is actually matured in a stone warehouse only centimetres from the ocean, if the scenery is appropriately created, the audience will suspend disbelief and invest in the alternate world that has hopefully been created. my art teacher taught me which colours excelled under stage lighting, and which i should avoid, and so accomplished were the actors and actresses (one of whom went onto a successful career on stage and at the movies), that the whole enchilada drew parents and staff into the very world we'd hoped to create.
yet only a few footsteps taken backstage would have revealed the pretence; the scenery (known as flats) consisted of sheets of hardboard nailed to a wooden frame, and held upright by angled supports, augmented with heavy weights to forestall any untoward movement. the outward portion of the flats were painted, or wallpapered to resemble the interior of a room, also concealing several individuals whose job it was to enhance the pretence practiced upon an expectant audience. it is a common ploy that can be seen at pretty much any theatre across the world.
a similar state of affairs can be witnessed if examining the html code that allows these black and yellow pixels to be seen more or less in the manner i fervently hope is present across the various devices on which reading takes place. web browsers need instruction on how these words and pictures are intended to be seen, instructions that i have pre-defined through what are referred to as cascading style sheets (css), though i'm not ashamed to admit that my grasp of such matters is rudimental at best. though you and i see a background of yellow, the web browser needs to know, either that it's #ffcc45 or 255,204,69.
the principle i'm trying very badly to describe was probably best illustrated by the movie series the matrix; effectively the workings and machinery behind our day to day world. and it is a state of affairs that permeates cycling, every bit as much as it does almost every other strain of modern living. watch any recent youtube video looking at this year's eurobike, and though the outward gloss persists even there, if you look close enough, there are an endless number of clues.
the outward presentation of the world of cycling, the one in which we are all invested to one degree or other, consists of possibly the widest range of suitable apparel available to any sport, along with an even wider range of bicycles and componentry. the facade is sustained, to a certain extent, by cycling websites (yes, possibly even this one), cycling media and related marketing outlets. the end result is, by and large, immaculately conceived, one into which we have willingly fallen hook, line and sinker. the longer we remain inhabitants, the less discriminating we become and the less likely we are to notice the ever-present hints.
some of those backstage pretences floated to the surface post-covid, when the cycling industry found itself in a bit of a pickle, predominantly due to overstocking, compounded by diminished sales. lowered ticket prices on bikeshop floors were the main hint, simply accepted as a bonus by those with limited perspective on the man behind the curtain.
backstage, however, matters are less carefull concealed and considerably less velocipedinally inclined, designed to appeal solely to those whose principal activity is to keep those of us in the matrix supplied with that which our hearts desire, quite frequently without any fascination for the world they support. to briefly elucidate that of which i write, a london-based investment bank with expertise in m & a (mergers and acquisitions) has apparently identified the bicycle industry as one ripe for a new wave of the latter.
we have previously discussed the fact that many of cycling's premier brands are owned by large, multi-national conglomerates or investment companies, mostly because they see cycling as likely to offer a healthy return on investment. in the case of tadej's favoured marque, chimera investments llc did indeed see a decent return, with colnago's profits having tripled in the past year. it's reasonably easy to identify in which part of the matrix you have landed, by analysing the use of language; to wit:
"With the market broadly expected to have largely dealt with its overstock problem in 2025, the report forecasts gradual recovery with significant upside in the medium to long term, with 2026 and 2027 marking 'pivotal years for increased M&A activity and investment opportunities'.
how many of us have had that conversation in the sunday morning peloton?
it is, however, a relationship with symbiotic properties; one depends very much upon the other. without our obsessing over carbon layup, electronic everything and constant switching between aero, non-aero and ultra-light, everything would come to a grinding halt, no-one would invest, and we'd still be riding lugged steel-tubing, with downtube gear levers and brake cables that exit the top of the levers. if that sounds like bliss, consider that even that particular niche corner is catered for on this side of the scenery. but the fact that there are enough willing to buy into the first part of that proposition, means there's still plenty of work for the stage managers and scene painters.
there has to be a light side of the moon, to contrast with the dark side.
image: ron bull/toronto star
saturday 13 july 2024
..........................................................................................................................................................................................................outsmarted
the recently ended eurobike expo in germany had on show many thousands of new developments, many of which were based on the way things seem to have been heading for the past few years. anything electronic, preferably wireless and 3d-printed was given exhibition space and often nodding approbation from those who had the stamina to walk the various halls. though i've never attended eurobike (and to be honest, i'm very unlikely ever to do so), the majority of details brought to the fore by the likes of gcn, hambini and dave arthur were almost certainly aimed at the pointy and expensive end of the cycling market. the sort of technology that's probably covertly being tested in france at present, but yet to be adopted by the industry at large.
however, the cycle industry is one which at least partially relies on the trickle down philosophy, where expensive technology eventually reaches the masses. the poster boy for that assumption would surely be shimano's di2, or sram's axs, both of which began life at the top, and have now reached the lower castes, where the price of admission is far more amenable to the rest of us. in several cases, it's possible that the trickling calls into question the very need for the top of the range offering. if 105 works every bit as well as dura-ace, why not save a few pennies and buy aero wheels that you don't need?
however, in our closeted, idiosyncratic corner of the world, there is a tendency to think only in terms of dura-ace, ultegra and 105, or red, force and rival. but any of you who have kids of a certain age, will be acquainted with the deeper penetration of technology, one example of which arrived at the back door of the croft only yesterday afternoon. many a long year has passed since kids' mountain bikes featured disc brakes, predominantly of the cable variety; after all, which nine or ten year-old has need of the stopping power or complexity of hydraulics?
as it transpires, need seems to have very little to do with it, even if the example under discussion exploits the two extremes in one bicycle. to make matters worse, said velocipede is a rather large bmx style machine, with a width of handlebar that challenges that of a hebridean single track stretch of tarmac.
on arrival, this bmx (do top-level bmx bikes actually feature hydraulic disc brakes? surely the very definition of pointlessness?) was minus the larger part of the front brake lever, with only the handlebar bracket left as evidence that such a lever was ever there in the first place. that lever was originally connected to a deep-drop front caliper rim brake that looks as if fabricated from bacofoil. yet the rear wheel is replete with a hydraulic disc brake, several levels of evolution above its frontmost partner. or at least, it would be more efficient technology were it in working order. which it isn't. in fact pulling hard on the lever elicits no response whatosever, indicating either a distinct lack of hydraulic fluid, or an entire atmosphere of air bubbles contained within. either way, i find myself totally unequipped to know where to begin.
though i'd prefer that you not think the less of me, my technical abilities were acquired long before hydraulic disc brakes were a twinkle in the bicycle industry's eye. should it turn out to be devoid of fluid, i have no idea which type. if simply a case of the brakes needing bled, i confess i have no idea where to start. it's a potential problem that i have successfully avoided when related to my specialized crux cyclocross bike, principally on the basis that the sram disc brakes in its possession continue to work precisely as desired. however, i do have to wonder of the logic of applying such technology to children's bicycles.
the basis for my consternation is bolstered by the two bikes that accompanied the latter's arrival. on one, both front and rear gear cables appear to be in need of replacement, predominantly due to the bicycle having spent remarkably little time indoors (as evidenced by a chain that retained its odd shape when removed). by and large, children do not look after their bicycles. more often than not, they are to be seen lying forlornly on the pavement, where they've probably lain for more than a week. and you can almost guarantee that, when dropped (as they inevitably would have been), it would be with the derailleur side down.
when i was that age, my father insisted that i fix each and every puncture, that i checked the tyre pressure at least once a week, and that every chain link (and only the rollers), received a measured drop of three-in-one oil every saturday morning.
even casual observation would suggest that those days are long gone, and that the demise of the average child's bicycle is hastened both by a complete lack of maintenance by any member of the family, and an apparent reduction in quality of build. while events such as eurobike concentrate on the next series of big things, it would be nice if a few sections of the industry had the perspicacity to realise which of those technologies simply do not belong on a child's bicycle. statistics would suggest that there are far fewer independent local bike shops than there were when i were a lad, playing directly into the current state of affairs that dictates few parents seem willing to seek professional fettling for junior's bicycle.
kids' bikes ought to be the very paragons of simplicity, remaining compliant with the meagre mechanical ability of the average parent. children under the age of ten simply do not need hydraulic disc brakes, full suspension, or more than five gears. whatever happened to common sense?
friday 12 july 2024
..........................................................................................................................................................................................................i've changed my mind
in the beginning, there was the threaded steerer and a headset to match, where any play in the headset could be initially cured by wielding a sizeable pair of spanners and tightening the two locknuts to prevent that fore and aft play when braking. the additional advantage of the threaded steerer was its partnering with the once ubiquitous, quill stem, allowing a raising and lowering of the bars, depending on the rider's height. it's a feature that still persists on the eurobike award winning buffalo s2 promoted by world bicycle relief. i believe it's possibly that feature alone that allows wbr to substantially minimize the requirement to keep stock of several frame sizes, and allow for a more pragmatic approach to the provision of bicycles in the poorer regions of africa.
the advent of the a-headset pretty much ruined any chances of continuing the ability to adjust handlebar height to suit each rider, though it's a courtesy that would hardly have survived the encroachment of carbon fibre in any case. aluminium eventually brought the necessity of fitting internal and subsequently, integrated headsets, if only to forestall any thoughts of equipping bicycles with very large external headsets.
though matters seem now to have been taken out of his hands, ernesto colnago was once on record as saying that no bicycle bearing his name on the downtube, would ever be fitted with an integrated headset. however, at around the same time he also alluded to the notion that never would any colnago bicycle be built anywhere other than italy, so you can see how that worked out. i often wonder if ernesto was arm-wrestled into capitulation; if left solely to his discretion, would tadej be riding aboard a colnago bicycle constructed in italy, with both internal headset and bottom bracket. or does the great man lie awake at night, harbouring regrets of making such bold statements?
i wonder the same thing about the trek bicycle company, which, in something of a rash move, made it plain several years ago, that never would they allow any of their authorised dealers to ship a bike direct to the customer without first having visited said dealership to receive a full bike fit, ensuring that their eventual purchase was admirably and technically suited to their size and purpose. this, said trek at the time, was to prevent unnecessary and potentially expensive returns, when the customer realised they'd ordered the wrong size. this, i can recount from personal experience, extended to the intrepid reviewer.
at the time of the initial announcement, i e-mailed trek's management to point out that, as an island dweller, and in common with those domiciled in britain's more remote rural locations, they had, in effect, added a surcharge to the purchase of one of their bicycles. had i set my heart on a new trek bicycle, i would have required to undertake two ferry journeys, two bus trips and incurred an overnight stay in glasgow city, in order to comply with their apparently restrictive practice. in fact, there was the very likelihood that i might have had need of a second night's stay in glasgow (location of my nearest trek dealer), should the timing of the necessitous bike-fit been unable to fit in with bus and ferry times for the return trip, one on which i may well have been unable to transport the desired and now perfectly fitting, trek bicycle.
it may not be surprising that they did not respond to my e-mail. however, on the off-chance that this might have heralded similar practices by other bicycle manufacturers, i contacted several uk distributors to enquire if this was likely to be the case. thankfully, none seemed keen to follow in trek's tyre-tracks.
a short period later, in response to a request to review the trek madone of the day, i was advised to visit alpine bikes in glasgow to undergo the bikefit mentioned above before they would ship the bicycle across to islay. strangely enough, and despite having undergone the required bikefit, when the bicycle arrived in its cardboard box, none of the parameters revealed by the fitter had been applied to the madone. go figure.
however, now that a number of years have passed and the retail landscape (as i believe is the correct reference) has unquestionably altered, trek have obviously had time and cause to reconsider, having recently announced that it will now be possible to place online orders for their bikes. and in order that their authorised dealers do not have their collective noses put out of joint, should the requested bicycle be in stock at the customer's nearest dealer, the sale (and profit) will be theirs to process. otherwise, trek will ship the bicycle from the warehouse, and the nearest dealer will be suitably compensated.
but as at least one social media commentator has pointed out, trek operate a network of branded stores, sometimes in relatively close proximity to an independent bike shop; so how will they figure out to which any commission ought to be paid? now that everything is becoming simpler, it seems that complexity is rarely far away. and whatever happened to the need to ensure the model and size ordered are the prudent choice?
money still talks.
wednesday 10 july 2024
..........................................................................................................................................................................................................help me out here
i have been fortunate enough to try all three electronic groupsets from sram, shimano and campagnolo, though admittedly the latter was their super-record eps system and not the super-record wireless groupset with which i have serious aesthetic concerns. however, those are entirely subjective and in no way should detract from the veracity of the wireless gear-changing. there are those who swear by electronic shifting, and i can see why, though i am also personally acquainted with riders who have subsequently returned to mechanical shifting following various technical problems with buttons and batteries.
from my own point of view, while i had minor problems with campagnolo system (in the days before vicenza produced its own disc brakes, the review version featured formula discs and levers, and it was a design flaw in the latter that fomented the problem), i cannot deny that each system did exactly what it said on the tin, even in the foul weather that often permeates the scottish hebrides, but, as i have repeated to the point of tediousness, it still seems like a solution looking for a problem.
my ritchey logic features a mechanical 2x campagnolo record groupset, while the specialized crux sports a sram rival 1x groupset, and though pressing buttons rather than pressing levers requires a tiny bit less effort, considering we could undoubtedly find a means of transport that was a tad easier than getting about by bicycle, surely the whole point of riding road, gravel, mountain or 'cross bikes is to become fitter and gain physical strength? in which case, where's the problem with levers? why spend around double the retail cost of mechanical simply to save a micro amount of energy?
so that inevitably leads onto the knowledge that, presumably following successful use by lotto dstny rider, victor campanaerts, the much vaunted classified system is now in use by the ineos world tour team. for those unfamiliar, the classified gearing setup purports to replace the need for a front derailleur and use of a double-chainset. this it does by means of an internal gearing cluster within the proprietary rear hub. working only with thru-axle disc equipped hubs (which, in itself, likely proves little in the way of a barrier to ownership nowadays), the wireless changing is accomplished by a button situated 'neath the bar tape at a point of contact suitable to the individual rider.
that button is connected to classified's smart handlebar unit, secreted in the bar end. a button press sends a signal to the lever that tightens the thru-axle in place in this case, equipped with a wireless receiver; on receipt of a button-push, thus effecting a gear change which replicates that of a front derailleur across two chainrings. regular up-and-down gear changes are untroubled, taken care of as they are by whichever gear system takes your fancy, upon a rear cassette featuring a proprietary freehub attachment, available for both sram/shimano and campagnolo. since that all sounds perfectly spiffing, where on earth could i have found a problem? have i not always been firmly of the opinion that the future of cycle gearing lies internally?
according to classified, the benefits of the system include the ability to change even under full load at power outputs well in excess of anything you and i could ever conceive. on a twelve-speed cassette, all 24 gears are available in small steps (though presumably dependent on the choice of cassette range). it is reputedly more efficient than either 1x or 2x systems (though personally, i've seen no statistics to support this contention) and shifting takes place within 150 milliseconds, possibly quicker than either you or i can decide we need to change gear. so far, so good.
but to take a look at a different set of numbers, a campagnolo super-record front derailleur retails at (the highest priced that i could find) £170 while a super-record inner chainring can be had for as much as £130. adding both together demands that your credit card or paypal account be lightened to the tune of £300. sram and shimano tend to cost a bit less.
however, opting to fit a classified system, compatible with any of the above, will trouble the card and paypal by a substantially greater figure - to wit: £2,300 (as stated on the classified website). bear in mind that, if you're a campagnolo aficionado, such a choice will exclude the full range of bora wheels, as indeed it will for shimano and zipp. many roadies possess two sets of wheels, allowing a spare pair or the potential for a change of rubber, depending on weather conditions. that means a classified enabled wheelset. assuming you'd like a custom set from your favoured wheelbuilder, the necessary parts will cost around £1,000 excluding rims, spokes and build price. the cost of a cassette may or may not be extra.
however, assuming i wish to follow in the tyretracks of geraint thomas, with only one set of wheels, i'd need to justify an additional expenditure of £2,000. but just to add insult to injury, in the majority of cases, prospective classified owners will already possess an inner chainring and a front gear mech, bringing us neatly back to the figure of £2,300 simply to replace the front derailleur. and it's worth bearing in mind that the professionals keen to use and praise the system were either provided with it free of charge as part of a team sponsorship deal, or at a discount.
am i missing something?
tuesday 9 july 2024
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